My popularity on Polyvore will eventually turn me into a computer nerd wih a sexy, understanding boyfriend.

Recently, I have gone onto polyvore.com. I created a few sets. Followed a couple people. Then I slid my eyes over to the right side of my profile and saw that I had 2,166 set views. I was like

OH MY GOD I'M SO POPULAR :D

Then I started looking at the people I'm following, and I noticed they had 100,000 followers. I was like

But you know what. Two thousand people in the world looked at my sets. And three of them followed me. (Upon closer inspection, one would find that one of them is my best friend, and the other two are random bitches who follow everyone, but that, sir, is irrelephant.) This means that someone in the world likes my online profile. And since I'm SO popular on Polyvore, I did some sly clickety-clicking and added a link to my blog on my profile. This way, I can be popular on here as well. Because honestly. The only people who are reading this right now are my two best friends* and, according to my stats, a very confused Korean. But if this blog just explodes with popularity, I will attribute it to the fact that I slyly advertised it on Polyvore.

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA I USED MIND CONTROL ON YOU ALL~

The more popular I get online, the more time I will spend online, the more I will turn into this:

But you know what. That guy is sexy if you squint your eyes and angle your head. So I am sure to find a kissing buddy who totally loves the whole computer-nerd thing and is like

and

If I could find a man like that, I would melt in orgasm. And I KNOW I will find one. Because I HAVE HOPE. Because I AM HOPEFUL.

I have to pee like a racehorse on steroids. And so concludes this blog post. *races to bathroom*






*And probably just the one at Artsy Like Athena, because people who do not have blogs do not understand the awesomeness of reading other people's blogs. They just get confused and bored and then they're like "Lol blogs are so pathetic it's pretty awk that my friend has one :|"